fiestaturbo.com

[Tom_S]

After being charged £20 for a £10 overdraft, 30-year-old Michael Howard of Leeds changed his name by deed poll to "Yorkshire Bank Plc are Fascist baxtered". The Bank has now asked him to close his account, and Mr baxtered has asked them to repay the 69p balance by cheque, made out in his new name.

Phreakers, or 'phone hackers, managed to break into the telephone system of 'Weight Watchers' in Glasgow, and changed the outgoing message to 'Hello, you fat baxtered'.

Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year old man at an airport hotel after he tried to pay with two $16 bills.

The Chico, California, City Council enacted a ban on nuclear weapons, setting a $500 fine for anyone detonating one within city limits.

A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in St. Louis. By the time police arrived on the scene, fourteen pedestrians had boarded the bus and had begun to complain of whiplash injuries and back pain.

A convict broke out of jail in Washington D. C. A few days later he went with his girlfriend to her trial for robbery. At lunch he went out for a sandwich. His girlfriend needed him, so she had him paged by the bailiff. Police officers recognized his name and arrested him when he returned to the courthouse in a car he had stolen over the lunch hour.

From the Churchdown Parish Magazine: 'Would the Congregation please note that the bowl at the back of the Church, labelled 'For The Sick', is for monetary donations only.'

From The Guardian re: sign seen in a Police canteen in Christchurch, New Zealand: 'Will the person who took a slice of cake from the Commissioner's Office return it immediately. It is needed as evidence in a poisoning case.'

From The Times: 'A young girl, who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth, was rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast-guard spokesman commented: "This sort of thing is all too common these days."'

In Sydney, 120 men named Henry attacked each other during a "My Name is Henry" convention. Henry Pantie of Canberra accused Henry Pap of Sydney of not being a Henry at all, but in fact an Angus. "It was a lie," explained Mr Pap. "I'm a Henry and always will be." At this point, Henry Pap attacked Henry Pantie, whilst two other Henrys - Jones and Dyer - attempted to pull them apart. Several more Henrys - Smith, Calderwood and Andrews became involved and soon the entire convention descended into a giant fist fight. The brawl was eventually broken up by riot police, led by a man named Shane.

From The Daily Telegraph headed "Brussels Pays £200,000 to Save Prostitutes": "... the money will not be going directly into the prostitutes' pocket, but will be used to encourage them to lead a better life. We will be training them for new positions in hotels."

From The Derby Abbey Community News: 'We apologise for the error in the last edition, in which we stated that 'Mr Fred Nicolme is a Defective in the Police Force'. This was a typographical error. We meant of course that Mr Nicolme is a Detective in the Police Farce.'

And these articles from The Manchester Evening News: 'Police called to arrest a naked man on the platform at Piccadilly Station released their suspect after he produced a valid rail ticket.'

[Phil Si]

And these articles from The Manchester Evening News: 'Police called to arrest a naked man on the platform at Piccadilly Station released their suspect after he produced a valid rail ticket.'

where did he produce it from tho

llama those are funny

[TJ]

From The Times: 'A young girl, who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth, was rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast-guard spokesman commented: "This sort of thing is all too common these days."'

In Sydney, 120 men named Henry attacked each other during a "My Name is Henry" convention. Henry Pantie of Canberra accused Henry Pap of Sydney of not being a Henry at all, but in fact an Angus. "It was a lie," explained Mr Pap. "I'm a Henry and always will be." At this point, Henry Pap attacked Henry Pantie, whilst two other Henrys - Jones and Dyer - attempted to pull them apart. Several more Henrys - Smith, Calderwood and Andrews became involved and soon the entire convention descended into a giant fist fight. The brawl was eventually broken up by riot police, led by a man named Shane.

[Brother Ant]

these two are the best

From The Daily Telegraph headed "Brussels Pays £200,000 to Save Prostitutes": "... the money will not be going directly into the prostitutes' pocket, but will be used to encourage them to lead a better life. We will be training them for new positions in hotels."

From The Derby Abbey Community News: 'We apologise for the error in the last edition, in which we stated that 'Mr Fred Nicolme is a Defective in the Police Force'. This was a typographical error. We meant of course that Mr Nicolme is a Detective in the Police Farce.'

[elm_us]

LMFAO all great

[KitKat]

Quality, total class

[Swanick]

From The Times: 'A young girl, who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth, was rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast-guard spokesman commented: "This sort of thing is all too common these days."'

that 1 is quality